The item thread

You go to the place that was spelled right, but that was a fake. There is a giant 100 foot tall rock that hates you and rocky, especially rocky. It can breathe fire and shoot lasers out of its eyes.

I quickly step around to the giant rock's side. After all, Knowing Rocky all these years I can safely assume that rocks can not turn as they have no limbs to do so with. Safely out of its attack range, I start annoying it with high speed, repetitive questions regarding Rocky's whereabouts.

Shockingly enough it turned toward you and spat flames. The heat was really hot.

AAAH NINJA! its a good thing im an assasin, i know ninjas one weakness! BOOBIES! i whip out a dirty magazine and throw it at him! DODGE THAT ATTACK MUAHAHAHAHA!

The ninja pillow turns into a perv frog pillow and eats the mag.

I pull out a deep fryer and a french man from my bottomless bag of tricks, and shout, "FREE FROG LEGS COOK EM YOURSELF!!!"

The pillow turns into a bomb. And then it exploded.

((Irrational, you have started something beutiful with these little cartoons!))

i grab the french man and use him as a shield, he scrams out, "MY GOD! ZEEZ FROG LEGZ ARE BOMBZ! VIVA LA REVOLUTION! CROSSIANTS AND NAPOLEAN SO ON AND SO FORTH!!!" he dies

luckily, through all that the man i was targeting to kill hadnt woken up yet, so i silently walk up to him pour the grease from the deep fryer onto his face

and i totally agree with iggy on that one... even if he didnt see donkey kong...

((Hey, I already killed myself over that one, gimme a break!))

The explosion turns into a pillow with a gun. Then the pillow shot the sleeping man before you could kill him.

Iggy: you have to save yourself from the motorcycle.

wait wait.. so... ninja-san... you're here for the same thing i am? hmmm... wunna grab some fried steak? i didnt use the all of the grease...

HOLY CRAP! OH MY DEAR SWEET LORD! THE ROCK CAN $%&^ING MOVE!

The pillow turned to a bull, and charged at you.

You bet i can! The rock yelled,

"ENOUGH!" I shout, pulling out my super soaker and fire. Due to the incredible heat of the giant rock, the water should cause his rocky hide to shatter! "NOTHING WILL KEEP ME FROM MY FRIEND!"

The rock isn't hurt, and then it has a rock attack. It dies, you should get back on the plane.

I get back in my [futuristic fighter jet] and continue my search, this time heading to the albe-whatever.

You walk into a supreme headquarters. It is mgs4 level security, and if you die the pilot will say Irr Irr Irrationaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllll!!!!

I don a clever disguise and make my way through the complex. No one will know it is me.

A large exclamation mark appears above your head as a potato running the metal detector finds something odd. He grabs his AK47 and blasts at you.

The potato's tiny appropriately sized AK-47 is incapable of causing me physical harm. I eat a baked potato.

"TORO!" i scream as the bull charges me, pulling a red sheet from my sack of endless goodies! MUAHAHA! i then pull a horse out of my sack, hop on it, grab a rope and lasso and throw it around the bull pillows neck, HA! IVE GOT YOU NOW!!!

((hey irrational, what program do you make those things in? its obviously not paint...))

You grab the potato and stick it in your mouth then it exploded. You're not dead, but it kinda hurt. Kinda. Then an alarm goes off playing a cool techno music. Letam Xer breaks in and attacks you with it's rock lasers.

Orphen, The bull turns into a bomb again. You see where this is going. And then it exploded.