Things you wish would actually happen...

First it's candy, then it's gum, then Germany invades Poland!

POLISH history POLISH history its fun to learn about POLAND!

first its candy, than its gum, than you have a midget stalker named flippo

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's the chesire cat.

first its candy, than its gum, then you must become a man

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's violation of human rights.

first its candy, then its gum, then its a meme!

Firstit's candy, then it's gum, then it's a crappy video game starring Peter Francis Geraci.

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's Sham-WOW!

First it's gum, then it's candy, then it's Oxi-clean!

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's talking you down from the ledge of a building.

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's a youtube poop.

first its candy, then its gum, then BAM your forty five with six kids and you dont know where you went wrong

First it's candy, then it's gum, then you've only got 100 years to live. (coldplay)

First it's candy, then it's gum, then...*sigh* I hate to have to tell you this...you have 2 months to live. I'm so sorry.

first its candy, than its gum, than Ive lost my best freind...

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's I'm sorry man. I'm sorry.

so what is it anyway, if you dont mind me asking Iggy...

What is what, Admin-sama?

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's got a gun to my head, send help!

you said you were dieing... of what?

First it's candy, then it's gum, then it's a broken heart, Admin-sama. A broken heart.

your asexual, I thought you didnt fall in that kind of love....

Love? Who said anything about love? It was a saw blade gone awry.

yet you still have 2 months...?

The saw blade had aids.

first its candy, than its gum, than its the cure for aids